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1. |
Abend
02:54
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It's Tuesday so I ride cross-town
said I wouldn't drown again tonight but I still might.
I'm giddy til 2AM,
giggling with friends or so I call them.
But in the moon washed street,
the howling wind, my pedal beating feet
I can't wait to collapse,
for the time to lapse so it begins:
it's the winter of my eyelids
hibernating until they sense spring.
Don't get put off by my silence;
it's the only way that I can sleep.
Woozy calls for confidence,
or so you says or so I'd like to think.
I reach out through the telephone
from my bedroom but you're not answering.
Is it that time so soon,
when we pack it in, when we all go down tonight?
I want the blue in you,
no, it's not too late, come over baby.
It's the winter of my eyelids
hibernating until they sense spring.
Don't get put off by my silence;
it's the only way that I can sleep.
Don't get put off by my singing,
don't get put off by my drinking,
don't get put off by my silence,
don't get put off by my violence,
because in you I have delighted,
in you I found delight.
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2. |
Au Clair de la Lune
03:32
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Hold me close,
don't ever loose that grip,
don't ever slip away in the night.
Tell me lies,
like you won't leave,
like you will never say goodbye.
I know, I know, you'll always go,
I know, I know,
you're not something I'll get to hold forever more
when the sun hits the blinds you're headed for the door.
Because in the morning I am alone
it's like you only exist by the light of the moon.
Well from the look in your eye
I see contempt,
I see something you want to say but won't.
Furrows and lines,
I can't believe
it took you this long to see
I'm not the girl you thought I was;
I'm not the best
I am the worst thing that ever happened to you, dear
when the sun hits the blinds I bet you'll disappear.
Because in the morning I am alone
it's like you only exist by the light of the moon.
You say the sun's in your eyes,
you’ve got a job,
you’ve got to get there right at nine.
Closing the blinds won't keep you here
and won't make you spill the beans on
why you never want to stay the night
and why you never state the reason
why it is you always bolt at the dawn.
When the sun hits the blinds you must be moving on.
Yeah, in the morning I am alone
it's like you only exist by the light of the moon.
Au clair de la lune,
tu es vraiment beau
mais au clair du matin
tu laisses moi tout seule.
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3. |
Angeschwollen
03:03
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I am ready, I am willing,
I am swollen with the longing for someone new.
I am ready, I am willing,
I am hungry with desire for new.
I peel off my clothing,
I pull up my stockings,
I push up my bra and
I shake out that hair.
I suck in my stomach
and screw up my courage
and smile through my nervous
and lie in your bed.
I am ready, I am willing,
I am swollen with the longing for someone new.
I am ready, I am willing,
I am hungry with desire for new.
Because you tell me I'm lovely,
but I know I am awful,
and I tell you I want you
but don't know if it's true
just don't want to feel winded
from news unexpected,
don't want to feel slighted
by choices I don't have,
don't want to feel worthless
when your words stop coming
but I do
and I will
and I never seem to stop it.
I just don't want to feel shame like the sun
burning my eyelids at dawn
and yet I can't bear the thought
of waking up alone.
I am ready, I am willing,
I am swollen with the longing for someone new.
I am ready, I am willing,
I am hungry with desire for new.
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4. |
Fuck Scene
03:07
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You look so smug standing there
in your trucker cap and chinos
with a hand rolled cigarette
and a can of PBR.
You look so pleased with yourself
and the girls around you love it
and I see you sort of want you
but I'm still not sold.
Because you're fine as gold
but you're cold as marble
I want to dip in my toe
I want to test your waters.
I get this pounding in my pounding in my pounding in my head
when I'm standing in your place in my party dress.
It's like the pounding of my pounding of my pounding of my heart
in the dark I don't know whether to kiss or kill you.
You think you're cool standing there
'cause you're so indifferent,
while the girls swoon and
sway under your aloof gaze.
I think you're scared
'cause you know your effect is fleeting
at the end of the night
you're still a regular joe.
You've got a uniform on,
I can smell your fear
you think you're passing this time
but I see through the veneer.
I get this pounding in my pounding in my pounding in my head
when I'm standing in your place in my party dress.
It's like the pounding of my pounding of my pounding of my heart
in the dark I don't know whether to kiss or kill you.
You've got a lovely facade and I want to destroy it.
You've got a way about you
that's better than this.
Come on take off that shirt,
and show me what you're made of;
are you man, are you mine,
are you ready to go?
Because I'm ready for you now.
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5. |
Apfelkern
02:50
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Six in the morning
and you're calling me
and you say you can't sleep
and you beg "sing to me."
Well I love you
but I hate it when
you make bad decisions
and you call me after them.
Whatever happened to the girl
who loved to face the world
with her tongue stuck out
and flipped bird flying high?
Even though it's not my fault,
I feel responsible
because I know this road.
Just know if I could make it better off,
I'd fix it if I could.
And know if I could change the way things are,
I would give anything I could,
but this is not an easy fix.
I know because I've seen it before.
I met her when I was 14
got her started smoking
and we improved our drinking.
By 16 she was tutoring me
and she was trying new things
and I didn't want to stop her.
Sometimes I think that it was me,
that I'm a toxic seed
that all these poison trees grow out of.
Sometimes I cannot fall asleep
because I have these dreams
that they're coming to drag me with them.
Just know if I could make it better off,
I'd fix it if I could.
And know if I could change the way things are,
I would give anything I could,
but this is not an easy fix.
I know because I've seen it before.
I wish to god that I could help her out
but she's too gone to benefit from help.
I wish that I could be a better friend
I wish I still knew how to be her friend.
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6. |
Koala
03:41
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I'm on a roll,
every time I shake my hips
it all clicks into place for me.
I'm in control,
swerving to avoid
each accident as I see fit.
But all is lost when I encounter you;
you are the stop to my go,
the block in my road.
I'm in your sights, and there's nothing I can do,
just sit back and relax
let you take control.
When I kissed you on the mouth,
I wanted to keep moving down
but you held me up
kept me wanting for more.
And when you kissed me on the hand
you said you knew I'd understand
but I did not and I do not
I just want you for now.
You got me up against the wall,
you got me hiking up my skirt,
you got me wrapped around your hips
and I will cling to you for dear life.
I'm all dolled up, every time I lick my lips
it's like a sign on my face alights.
I'm cleaning up,
anything I set my sights on
is suddenly within my grip.
But then you come,
and I shut down
you suck the light right out of me.
I am a one girl show,
I am just dancing for you
and I sway and I swoon
and you see me you know
that when I kissed you on the mouth
I almost felt my knees go out
but you pulled away,
you said, “baby, stay.”
And when you kissed me in the car
I knew you'd finally let your guard down
I'd crawl inside,
I'd nest in your life.
You got me up against the wall,
you got me hiking up my skirt,
you got me wrapped around your hips,
I will climb you like the mountain you are.
So when you kiss me on the mouth
remember I won't slow things down,
not for you,
no, no, not for anyone.
So when I climb into your bed,
I will just smile and shake my head.
I'll make you work,
I'll torture you.
You got me up against the wall,
you got me hiking up my skirt,
you got me wrapped around your hips
and I will cling to you for dear life.
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7. |
SWAK
03:51
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When I received the invitation
it was crystal clear to me
that this was a place to get lucky.
And yes, I know the reputation
but I'm not afraid to play
if the price is right and the stakes are high.
We'll do it right tonight.
We'll have the ride of our lives.
I got the RSVP for ya and it's sealed with a kiss,
NO is not in my vocabulary but shameless is.
Tonight we're public property
and we can't pretend that we won't offend.
We're not concerned with what tomorrow brings
just as long as we get what we want tonight.
Well it's cold out there
but it's warm in here,
so step into the parlor, little flies.
Come on and take off that coat
and hand me your note
and I'll welcome you inside.
We're getting high on each other.
We're so fine and we love it.
I did my make up in the mirror and it was sealed with a kiss.
NO is not in my vocabulary but desperate is.
Tonight we're public property
and we can't pretend that we won't offend.
We're not concerned with what tomorrow brings
just as long as we get what we want tonight.
They say the youth of today is crazy,
I say maybe they are right.
We do what we want
we live outside
and we do it all with pride.
When we're alright you're confounded.
We're so alive, you’re just jealous.
I had a really lovely evening it was sealed with a kiss
NO is not in my vocabulary but NSA is.
Tonight we're public property
and we can't pretend that we won't offend.
We're not concerned with what tomorrow brings
just as long as we get what we want tonight.
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8. |
Dornröschen
04:59
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Bent up curled in are you the prince come to
wake me from my sleep?
Please leave me sir I don't want to be
torn away from dreams.
Like a girl in a tower I need to be saved,
but not by you, or anyone like you.
You’re not a prince, hell,
you’re hardly even a man.
And you told me I was pretty,
well is that your apology?
You said "you didn’t stop me,"
well is that supposed to be an apology?
Why did you take me, take me, take me
while I was sleeping, sleeping, sleeping?
You infiltrate me and you program me to believe
what you want me to think and who you want me to be,
believe me, sir
I want to get you out of me.
Like a girl in a dungeon I need to be saved,
but not by you or anyone like you.
You’re a coward, hell,
I can even out drink you.
And you told me I was pretty,
well is that your apology?
And you said "you didn’t stop me,"
well is that supposed to be an apology?
Why did you take me, take me, take me
while I was sleeping, sleeping, sleeping?
Like a girl under a spell I need to be saved
but not by you or anyone like you.
From now on, I'm the only one
who brings me back from the land of Nod.
And you told me I was pretty,
well is that your apology?
And you said "you didn’t stop me,"
well is that supposed to be an apology?
Why did you take me, take me, take me
while I was sleeping, sleeping, sleeping?
Maybe I loved a bit too much
but nobody deserves to be cheated while dreaming.
Maybe I drank a bit too much
but nobody deserves to wake up to bleeding.
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9. |
Himalayas
04:14
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Those last three inches
between our mouths were the Himalayas,
splendid and cold;
they wanted to be conquered.
And each millimeter forward
seemed like a victory.
These last three inches
between our bodies felt like a vacuum.
We couldn't pull together close enough
to fill the void that lay
in each of our palms
a universe of secrets
that would be destroyed by touch.
But those last three moments
seemed to go so much faster than the rest
as you stumbled and fell in shame
excusing yourself
to the stairwell
and leaving me alone and freezing
in a barren land.
He sat on the edge
of the bed suddenly so much less naked
than I felt,
even though I was wearing
a hell of a lot more than he was.
His silence spoke volumes
for his thoughts and every time his eyes changed
I thought his mouth might open
and accidentally spill his thoughts
like playing cards on the bed between us.
But he kept his cards to his chest
and I didn't dare guess what he thought.
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10. |
Aiding and Abetting
03:51
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This could be the only chance I had
and I blew it.
This could be the only part of you I could keep
and I gave it away.
Only shot I had in my life
and I threw it.
This could be the only part of you I could keep
and I lost it.
Yeah, there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
I killed it.
There's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
I killed it.
This could be my only chance I had
and I blew it.
This could be the only shot I had
and I threw the game.
Only thing I ever feared in my life
and I had it.
What could I have done but run away?
And there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
I killed it.
And there's blood on my hands
blood on my legs
blood on my face
I killed it, you know.
Extend my wrists,
look all the scars are gone
except the X you marked
on the place where you said
your lips could feel my heart.
I finally lied
when I told you everything was fine.
I could've cried
but I swallowed those tears
and now you'll never know.
This could be the only chance I had
and I blew it.
This could be the part of you I could keep
and I gave it away.
And maybe one day I'll say to you
you know, he's got your eyes, he’s got your eyes.
This could've been the only chance I ever had
and I blew it.
And there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my legs
I killed it.
And there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
there's blood on my hands
He could've been yours you too.
Extend my wrists,
look all the scars are gone
except the X you marked
on the place where you said
your lips could feel my heart.
I finally lied
when I told you everything was fine.
I could've cried
but I swallowed that truth
and now you'll never know.
So I buried my smile,
I buried my smile,
I buried my smile
when I killed it.
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11. |
Verdammt
03:22
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I press my nose to the glass
and I'm transported back
in my head to the place
where I first learned your name
pressed up against a fence
all that chain in my back
and it bent to your will like
my spine when you came.
I got into my car
and I got out of there,
I didn't want to stay there
and watch you disappear.
I remember your face when
you first learned my name
and the way that you smiled
as you looked right through me.
Checked the papers for days
trying to find your name,
hoping it wasn't there,
hoping you were okay,
'cause I left you alone
when you needed me most.
Just a kiss for good luck
and then I headed home.
You held me so tight
I could never feel unsafe.
I was so damned happy
to be with you those days.
Press my nose to the glass
and I finally break.
In my head this would end
differently than it is:
you would save me again
like you saved me that day,
I would not be here now
telling these men your name.
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12. |
Immer So
01:49
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It's every single day and every single fucking night.
I want to fuck it up, I want to ruin your whole life.
After the ball drops in your court
you hit it straight into my face
and I am always so confused
by your sadistic pleasures.
I want to slam this door
escape the room and crawl out the window
but when I see your face I'm stuck.
It's every single day and every single fucking night.
I want to fuck it up, I want to ruin your whole life.
And Maddie says to me, "This anger will consume you baby."
I'd rather be consumed than stuck.
It's every single day and every single fucking night.
I want to fuck it up, I want to ruin your whole life.
With every word I say I know I'm digging my own grave.
No matter what I say, you know I'll never get it right.
It's every single day and every single fucking night.
I want to fuck it up, I want to ruin your whole life.
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13. |
Frei
05:04
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14. |
Party Girl
05:39
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Last night's party
was all over the place.
I don't know where I went
or what I did,
but it was good times--
I'm pretty sure of that--
because I've got this headache
and this man in my bed.
And I say baby baby baby baby
come on kiss me again
I'll make you feel like a man
and he says come on come on come on come on
we done it twice already,
I gotta go really early
I say baby baby baby baby baby baby
then let's have another drink.
Last night's lover
is in a hospital bed
I don't know what I said,
I don't know what I did
but it was something rotten naughty and dumb.
I think I've done it this time
I think I hurt someone good.
And he says baby baby baby baby baby
you're a party girl now
you got no room for regret
and I say come on come on come on come on
we should cool it a bit
because we're both in too deep
and he says baby baby baby baby baby
let's have a drink and start it.
Last night's heartbreak
is finally with me again
I'll drink until the world spins
and I won't ever stop because I'm ruined.
I wear the mark of the whore.
I can't fake it anymore
I just can't live my life.
And I say baby baby baby baby baby
give me more alcohol
I don't want to feel at all
and he says come on come on come on come on come on
who could hurt you like this
your heart's been stone for years
and I say baby baby baby baby baby
shut up and just get me a drink.
What you don't know could fill an ocean
I want to dive in and drown my sorrows.
I've lived through nightmares you can't even dream up
and every hero I've had has been a fantastic liar
and here you tell me you need me
and you say that you want me
then you leave me high and dry
and here you tell me you loved me,
and you say you can save me
but all you do is humiliate me.
Last night's party
is all over my face
I am a walking shame
I'm like the caution tape
"do not enter"
these roads all lead to one place.
I am disgusting at dawn
and they all stand and stare.
They say, baby baby baby baby baby
bring the party girl back
we wanna fuck her again,
and I say come on come on come on come on
daddy look you were right
your daughter's branded for life
and they say baby baby baby baby baby
come on let’s have just one more drink and I oblige.
I say I just want to go home
but they know I'm unwilling or incapable.
I say I just wanna be a good girl
they say yeah right, not likely this time of night.
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15. |
No Panic
01:57
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LAM! LAM! North Carolina
LAM! LAM! is (mostly) unintentional rubenesque burlesque. LAM! LAM! chews up your subconscious desires and spits them back at you with a sassy uhn-tiss uhn-tiss uhn-tiss. It's a sex dance and rock and roll extravaganza with a conscience but without shame. ... more
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